What I Did Right

A quick overview of my greatness in the last few days: lost 1.2 pounds at WI (same as CL!); took Zu for a walk downtown yesterday; completed two phys. therapy sessions, am sitting with 'new' posture and doing the assigned excercises; journaled everything I put in my mouth.

The back is killing me, so my level of strenuous exercise has decreased to walking the dog. Gotta tell ya, this is NOT my favorite part of the healing process. But I do have a better idea of what is going on: I have a very weak core. We already knew that, but I'm also hypermobile, meaning the ligaments in my neck are not tight enough to keep my neck where it needs to be. Instead, my muscles (which are weak) are working overtime. So they are sore and tight which then hurts my neck and back more. I'm retraining my muscles in my back to be where they need to be (instead of the slumped position they have adopted in the last few years) and working to breath from my diaphragm rather than my neck (I know, how do ya breathe from your NECK!?). Eating in the next week is going to be really important bc I wont be getting as many APs as usual.

ANOTHER trainer told me I look like I've lost weight. Great little smile from that one, for sure. My friend Betsy is feeling down bc she hasn't been doing so great with points lately. But I am still sooo proud of her for exercising, and just being aware of what needs to happen. Some days, folks, getting out of bed is a victory.

Our new neighbor is moving in today. Hope she is cool and likes Zu (and vice versa). Craig is out getting groceries for the week. Mom gave us last year's big WW cookbook so picked some yummies out of there to try for our VDay dinner on Sunday. I am hoping our new tradition can be to cook a wonderful, OP meal together on Sundays. A much better option than going out to a high-cal, high-priced meal on the town.

Planning on taking a good walk with Zu in a few hours. It's very windy so we'll have to see how far we make it. Also doing my first interview for my freelance Gaz assignment - talking to the peeps at Bruno's about moving location. I LOVE Bruno's, so hope they don't have any stray cheesecake lying around!

The Good and the Bad

I forgot to mention: I talked to the doc about my struggles to lose weight. She informed me that since I'm on antidepressants, and a rather high dosage at that, it's just going to be hard. No advice on how to make it easier; no suggestions that I could just go off my meds; no empathy at all. I asked Craig what he thought about my ditching of the meds, and he said no way, jose. Of course, this is my non-drugged, 14-pounds-gone-in-a-week husband, who also prefers his wife mentally sound and only a little crazy, so he would naturally choose the option that is best for me, even if it doesn't make me skinny (sorry about the run-on).

We were in Fairview over the weekend, which included tournaments in Wolf Point. Food features there: pizza, nachos, popcorn, candy, rice krispies, sloppy joes. Nary a veggie in sight. We started our Saturday at Stella's with a heaping helping of breakfast because we knew it would be late afternoon by the time we had another meal. But even with just eating twice, we sucked it up on the points. BAD.

On Sunday, we had chocolate chip pancakes for breakfast. Another two meal day that included dinner at Cheryl's, which is always guaranteed to please. She had out veggies and grapes - I ate a lot of them. Why is it that whenever I have that stuff in the house, it just goes bad but when someone else cleans and preps it, I eat it by the fistful. I should have someone come do that for me daily and maybe there will be more carrots and less crackers. Dinner was Cheryl's attempt to be healthy for our benefit - sweet and sour chicken and rice. It was very good although the sugar in the recipe negated some of the health elements. Grama made Craig a birthday cake - red velvet with cream cheese frosting. Three layers. And it was SOOO FRICKING GOOD!!!!! I had two and a half pieces last night. NOT GOOD. We left the cake at mom and dad's because it was definitely not in our best interest to have it with us.

We hit the gym when we got back to town. Craig was resistant but had a really good workout, which I will remind him of whenever he balks at going. I went to Activate America, and the instructor told me that I look like I've lost a lot of weight. Another woman said she was thinking the same thing! So I guess that although I've only shed three pounds, my body is obviously changing as a result of working out so much and including strength training in that. I feel like now that I know how to do more than just the elliptical I can accomplish so much more at the gym, or at least get a better bang for my workout buck.

Two Two Two in a Row!

For the first time ever, coming at you from Billings Weight Watchers, ladies and gentlemen ...
Angie Lancaster has lost weight two weeks in a row!!!
That's right! Three pounds in two weeks! She is nearly back to her pre-holiday weight! Let's hear it for Angie!!!!


Thank you thank you thank you ... I give credit to my computer for allowing me to count points, my boss for saying stop eating from the kitchen, and most of all my wonderful husband for telling me to PUT THE CHOCOLATE DOWN!!

In other news ... I am so hungry! Had oatmeal at 7 this a.m. then a few hours later bagel with cream cheese (wiped off most of the cream cheese - ew! who needs that much cream anything?) with a latte, but didnt eat again til almost 3. A three+hour nap will do that to you.

The nap was a rsult of muscle relaxers, prescribed this morning by my doc. She told me all along my shoulder problem has been with my muscles being too tight, which rings true. She gave me muscle relaxers and I'm going to be doing PT as well. This might just be the answer, and better yet, NO CHRIROPRACTOR!

My goal for the week is to stay within my allowed points. If I had this week, just think what my 1.4 pounds could have been!

Got to the Gym and wanted MORE!!!

I was so tired today for some reason. Could be partly due to picking Craig up from work at 1 am but I was in bed early so it shouldnt have been a big deal. Anyway, I got home from work around 3 and rather than doing the 20 errands I needed to do, I took a nap with Zu. I haven't taken a weekday nap in ages and it was scrumptious!

Went to Activate America. We are on Week 5 and dont really need much instruction although I do really like the leader and people in the class. We did 30 min. cardio then spent the rest of the time going through machines in the Life Center. I have liked the leg machines up there for a long time but have never really known how to do the other stuff. I am more confident about them now. There is a couch25K program that I am interested in doing - trains you for a 5K if that's not clear. I would really like to do one this spring or fall but am going to need to tape my legs to fight the shin splints. If that doesn't work, I don't know how I'll run.

We got my chiropractor bill today - $263 for two months of care. Craig says he'd like to see me do some other treatment because our insurance doesn't cover it. I see the negative aspects of chiropractic care, but it is the only thing that has worked so far. I do not want to live in pain and I don't want to be scarfing pain pills the rest of my life. Surgery is not an option. I've done neurology, PT, ortho, cortisone shots, massage - and I'm still not clear on what exactly is wrong (beyond tight muscles and bad rotation) or why it is like that but I hate how it affects my life. Craig has never been with me as a pain-free woman and I tend to think I might be even more lovable if that is the case.

Do It Already

I haven't blogged in almost a month.
That would be the same month in which I gained weight ABOVE my original starting point.
The same month that I was at the gym four times a week.
And the month Craig joined W.W. with me.

I am working hard - and last week lost 1.6. I saved points to go out with my husband to Enzo's on Saturday. I left the house during SuperBowl so wasn't subject to the fried food and weinies and chips.

But tonight - I got mad. I was upset. Anxiety infused my soul.
So I ate.
I ate the rest of a bag of chips, about 12 points worth.

Friday is weigh in. Between now and then there will be 6 bottles of water and 90 minutes at the gym. Veggies, fruits and chicken. Yogurt and popcorn and turkey.

I don't fail. I'm doing it.

FEEL the BURN

So if my computer and memory card were compatible, I'd post of pic of me right now. Not a 'look how much I've shrunk' pic but a 'look how much I've sweat' pic.

Tonight I had an Activate America workout and added 30 minutes of cardio. So I got there early, put in 30 on the elliptical, and hopped on the recumbent bike for the 'get your heart rate up' portion of the class (mine was already a'boomin). Then, Jessie told us we would be going up to the track to do laps - one each of walking, jogging and running. And we'd do it twice.

So we get up there and I tell her during the walk how nervous I am because I DON'T run. Ever. I can run across the street and feel that is a victory. I was always the slowest kid in class, and have been of the opinion that I have no desire to run unless someone's chasing me, and then it better be fatal if I don't. Jessie, being a great trainer, of course encouraged me and told me how great I was doing - so I started the jog. Then on that last lap of run, she encouraged me to 'push it! push it!' and I did. I tend to think my jog is fairly fast so maybe there wasn't much difference between it and my run - but it could be that my run is just very slow.

There was a guy up there running who made it look so easy. He went hard and fast and POUNDED around the track (oo, anyone else get turned on by reading that?). And in my tendency to compare myself to others, I felt inferior but I KEPT GOING. I couldn't get my breath after I ran, so I walked really slow in order to be able to breathe.

No help.

I did the next set of laps way behind everyone else just cheering myself to get through it - and when I was almost done, Jessie announced "we're doing another set! c'mon guys!". So I did. Sorta. I jogged (shuffled) one lap between two laps of walk.

Because one of my goals of all this is to be able to run a 5K (and eventually walk the Avon Marathon for Breast Cancer or whatever it's called) I do want to keep running. But I'm going to take a hit of albuterol as part of the prep. Tomorrow, I am going to do 30 mins. machine work, abs and legs. But Friday, I'll be back on that track, pushing myself to go just a little farther.

Naked Truth

So I did it. Got a full month mirror. Stood in front of it in my birthday suit.
And now, I'm going to describe (as an artiste) what it is I see in that mirror.

Head - Hair the color of autum leaves and a complexion of sun speckles. Beautiful smile with a hint of laughter in the eyes.
Chin - Round and soft like a baby's.
Neck - Not all that long but leads to a set of strong, built shoulders.
Cleavage, chest - A strong chest that blossoms into full breasts of pale cream. Breasts are young and solid and full of preparation.
Stomach, abdomen - Folds of soft butter or icing, piling above my hips.
Hips - Wide and soft, spreading slightly from my stomach and abdomen.
Butt - Full and high, a booty that supports.
Thighs - Large and flexible, the tops of my legs are like the cup of a winner's trophy.
Legs - Wide on top and narrown toward my ankles. My calves are defined with the flex of a woman who is always going somewhere.
Ankles - Spindly, almost, they look even dainty.
Feet - Bones and veins extend toward the top of the skin. My toes stop short.

Try it. It's fun - ok, at least it's educational.